devi maisha of sensual energy alchemy talks the wonders of offering yourself your own erotic energy in every season of your life— kristen jeré
content warning: this article gently mentions healing from s*xual ass*ult. we invite you to honor your capacity while reading.
for devi, the spiritual and the physical have always been intertwined. a Black girl who was raised in a Buddhist household, learning about mindfulness and breathwork at a much younger age than her peers, devi grew up to become a woman curious of many things — one of which being a keen interest in sacred sexuality. “i loved the Kama Sutra. I wanted to do yoga because I wanted to have better sex. i was always interested in that. but combining it with meditation and breath-work, learning that while sex and orgasms are great, when bodies come together it can become this magical experience beyond the pleasure of the moment, that it can heal and expand your mental capacities, that’s what got me into [sacred sexuality].”
now, as a teacher of sacred sexuality, devi seeks to help liberate Black women from internalized myths about their sexuality that keep them from discovering their erotic through individual coaching sessions, online courses on sacred sexuality, and teaching of sacred rituals. she first started sensual energy alchemy, a hub for sharing these gifts, in 2017, but the process wasn’t linear. “i leaned into the work [at first] and then, like a lot of people, i leaned out because i was scared, and then i leaned back in. so on and so forth.” through the ebb and flows, devi was still able to offer programming or classes of some kind every year. “i did an oral sex class for women, an oral sex class for men,” devi said, sharing just a bit of what she’s done so far.
in her spiritual practice, she has had to learn the importance of starting at the root for women who are at the beginning of their healing journeys. “i realized that women learning how to create without learning about nervous system regulation increases more chaos.” she continued, “there’s no point in introducing manifestation when you're still dealing with hurt from a past relationship, or even ‘daddy issues’ or ‘mommy issues.’”
devi continued to speak about foundational beliefs that often keep Black women from accessing their erotic. “we tend to have this thing as women where we’re like ‘i would give you the shirt off my back’ and we’re very much in this martyrdom place. we don’t allow ourselves to receive.” devi explains how this can show up in various places in Black women’s lives, especially those that are sensual and romantic. “[often Black women are] feeling that we don’t get to receive love unless we think we’ve earned it somehow. and then we start thinking ‘maybe I can get love, but I have to work to keep it. it’s not gonna stay.’”
the solution? getting Black women to a place where they are ready to receive and honor that cycle of give and take. “when we’re open and receptive, the giving just comes. [then] when we’re able to receive, we are able to give more. when we’re able to accept care, we are able to care more,” says devi.
and there’s never a point in time in the journey of nurturing the erotic that is considered to be “too late.” without surprise, devi says, “most of the women who come to me tend to be between 30 and 45. they came up at such a different time. there were no goddess circles, there were no [in the mainstream] yoni eggs. there were no boundaries. we were taught to be nice to everybody.” she’s noticed a difference in younger generations, a type of freedom to be their authentic selves, that she feels all women can benefit from. “when we’re actually in our erotic we don’t need to shrink or defend. we’re comfortable. we’re anchored.”
in the same breath, this work of nurturing the erotic is deeply intergenerational. on the heels of grief after her mother’s passing, devi talks about the spaces in herself she was able to heal that her mother wasn’t able to heal in herself while she was here. “i saw how my mother didn’t really get to access her erotic, and i got to make space for it in me, and she was able to heal that through me, even though she’s not here.”
devi uses her experience of grief and trauma to aid others who come through sensual energy alchemy, whether it is grief from loss of past versions of self or trauma from sexual assault.
“i work on helping them move through that grief in a way that doesn’t reenact or reopen the wound, but gives them a sense of empowerment through the process, and it’s different for each woman.” devi talks about giving Black women who are often weighed down by stigmas of being perceived as “angry black women” permission to release their anger, in the same way that a Black woman who’s wound tight from trauma is encouraged to literally “color outside the lines” while making art.
in the process, there is space for healing from ideas that Black women have had projected on them, ranging from bias around menstrual cycles as Black girls to being slut-shamed as Black teenagers and women. “there’s so much shame that Black girls are taught that we carry with us when we become women,” said devi. the erotic becomes essential to reclaiming that part of self. “erotic energy helps us move trauma through our wombs,” she explained. “we are healing as the erotic moves the body. it allows layers of the old self to sloth off and all that’s left after is you. that's alchemy. that’s how you change your life.” afterwards, one can start discovering their erotic, its unique flavors, energy, and sound.
for women in the beginning of their erotic journeys who come to her for alchemy and wisdom, devi starts with a simple practice of rubbing the hands together. “we are electric. we are energy.” she validates. that initial connection with one's own power often helps her clients to begin taking larger steps in their erotic journeys.
another practice she suggests is somewhat of a classic for those familiar with tuning into their body’s sensations. “i suggest that women lay nude on their bed, or with as little clothing as they are comfortable with having off, with their palms resting on their inner thighs, and that they start to notice what sensations they feel in their vulvas: any tingling, any numbness, heat, etc. and start to just notice. that awareness right there really just begins to wake up the erotic energy and then from there we can really start to work.”
BY KRISTEN JERÉ
(she/her)
kristen is a budding herbalist, doula, and a writer on identity, culture and Black womanhood. in her freetime, you can catch her watching something animated while reading one of the many books on her lists.